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DIY – Spreader Bars

Began the actual making of the spreader bars this weekend and the progress has been quiet quick.

We bought the following items to make them:-

  • 1 Single length of wood cut into sections at the hardware store
  • Eyelets
  • A work bench
  • Mitre guide
  • Hand saw
  • Cuffs (ankle & wrist)
  • Paint

I first of all had to straighten the cuts in the wood, they weren’t as straight as I’d have liked so with the mitre guide I recut knocking a little bit off each pole. Then sanding down the edges to smooth them a little so that if a foot/wrist gets knicked by the pole its not going to hurt too much.

Each pole is going to be sanded fully before painting but have already drilled the guide holes for the eyelets, and had a bit of a test run to make sure the size is ok.

More progress to come but attaching the pictures of the work so far.


Sorry for the extremely long time to update, but the spreader bars have I promise been completed for quiet some time. I’ve not got any pictures of them in use as such (although I must say they are very fun when on my knees with Miss fucking my ass).


As you can tell I’ve painted the rods to give them a nice metallic sheen,  and to completely contrast restraints. I think they’ve turned out pretty well and really can’t wait for them to be used more.



So yesterday I had a rather dull morning, but I had woken up with an idea in my head that wouldn’t shift. I practically begged Miss to spank my ass till it was red. All this whilst she was at work for the day, I was working from home and had to go to a dental appointment and then a rather boring meeting. Miss made a stipulation that I could have 5 spanks for every task I completed on OurHome, now I hadn’t slept the evening before so I had already completed a good few tasks so was already in for a session of spanking.

But I went to work tidying and doing little bits, after a few I was more doing them because they needed doing than the spanking I would recieve so I had actually done over 20 by the time that Miss got home. Miss had asked me to put on something skimpy and pink, also to have the paddle prepared on the bed for when she got home. All done with gusto and excitement, I really was looking forward to my bottom being red. I put on some stockings, a gstring with a lacey front and pink fabric as well as the high heels I purchased months ago.

When Miss got back she was surprised by the shoes (she thought it was weird how tall I was), although later she said “She didn’t hate the shoes” (Open to a comment Miss on whether you don’t hate or do like?). I’d got out 2 paddles, a cane & an over the door restraint Miss had purchased a little while ago. She decided on the paddle she wanted to use, the restraint to hold me still and also a blindfold.

The Results you might say was definitely to my liking

Today I’ve been able to feel the slight bruises (a rather pleasant reminder).


Testing a New Method

I found an app for android or iPhone called OurHome its a little kiddy in design but allows for setup of various different tasks and also a list of rewards. Each task completed gives a predefined number of points which can be spent on rewards. Miss spent some time yesterday tuning the tasks and adding some rewards to it and I’ve been ticking off what I’ve done thus far.

At the bottom I’ve include a couple of screenshots of how it tracks things. You’re able to setup recurring tasks, tasks that can be completed a few times and the like. We’ve only just started using it so yet to really do much with it but I’ll keep you posted. If you want something that’s easy to track after a bit of setup it seems quiet good though.





Its long been something I’ve been extremely interested in, something you’d almost say I’ve long desired. See I have a little issue, I tend to spurt a little too quickly from penetration. Its a problem that seems to come and go but it is a problem and something I rather dislike about myself. With being into femdom and wishing to hand over control to my Miss, it is something I’ve brought up and we’ve talked about. She is curious and has offered to measure me for a device.

Hoping to try this soon and will update this post over time with a bit more but wanted to get a few words down about the subject and my interest in it.


Possible Femdom Rules

  1. sub will always dress to please Miss, wether naked or in clothes that sub believes would please Miss. If Miss wishes for sub to change sub will do so without complaint.
  2. When undressing, sub is to fold the clothes and place them out of the way.
  3. sub will wear and gratefully accept any toys Miss chooses to insert or adorn him with while serving or in any other circumstance.
  4. sub may request an opportunity to serve Miss in the following way: “Would it please you to have your sub serve you?”
  5. sub will always thank Miss for an opportunity to serve whether it was doing chores or being flogged.
  6. sub will serve Miss with food and drinks as requested, kneeling as the food or drinks are presented. In the presence of others, sub will still serve Miss, but does not have to do so on his knees unless expressly commanded by Miss.
  7. sub will remain attentive to make sure that Miss never has to ask for additional food or drink, whether in private or in the presence of others. A good sub is always ready before the command is issued.
  8. sub must use high protocol when playing the sub role. This means that sub will not use first person language when referring to him or herself, but shall always refer to the sub with the following references:sub must use high protocol when playing the sub role. This means that sub will not use first person language when referring to him or herself, but shall always refer to the sub with the following references:
    • sub
    • Miss’s pet
    • cum slut
    • dirty little whore
    • naughty girl
    • the unworthy one
    • bad/good dog
  9. sub will tend to Miss’s bath needs further by shaving her legs and pussy when needed. sub will be very careful in this and go slowly as to avoid injury to Miss. sub will lick and kiss every part of Miss that he has shaven after he is done as a sign of gratitude for Misss bestowing the honor on sub. Once sub has completed Misss bathing, sub will dry Miss fully, then apply lotion to Misss entire body. sub will then ask Miss for permission to assist Miss in getting dressed/ready, and respond appropriately.
  10. Punishment and or discipline take precedence over any other command.
  11. sub must show gratitude for punishment and or discipline.
  12. sub must take correction gracefully and maintain a grateful presence around the house after the fact.
  13. sub must ALWAYS confess to disobedience and take responsibility even when Miss is not present and beg for punishment and or discipline. If Miss is unavailable for immediate punishment, sub must come up with a suitable mini-punishment for himself, carry it out, report it to Miss and await Misss final judgment and punishment.
  14. sub must be available for sexual service whenever Miss requires.
  15. sub must always be ready for any form of sexual service, which would mean that his body must be prepared in order to make it easy for Miss to use him.
  16. sub will be clean and pleasant to all the senses at all times.
  17. sub will not be allowed to have an orgasm without permission.
  18. sub is not allowed to touch his owner’s property without permission in any sexual way.
  19. sub should never question Miss’s commands, and simply must immediately upon receiving them proceed to carry out his task gratefully.
  20. sub surrenders control to his Miss. He surrenders control of his body, how he spends his time, how he dresses, what he eats, where he sleeps. In all aspects, the Miss controls the sub.
  21. sub’s purpose is to please his Miss, more than anything else She owns, he must learn to control his response to sexual stimulation for the greater enjoyment of his Miss. his orgasm is the only that the sub has left to control for himself. Failure to control his orgasm is disobedience. Disobedience requires punishment.
  22. If Miss prefers simply to torment the sub and deny him release, then the sub must control himself to provide Her this pleasure. sub must dedicate himself to abstinence and thank his Miss humbly for removing the pleasure of ejaculation, thus allowing him to dedicate his lost pleasure to Her.
  23. If Miss demands satisfaction through sexual intercourse, sub must be able to control effectively his own orgasm so that it is timed to the pleasure of his Miss. His purpose is not to please himself but to please Her.
  24. sub should be as clean-shaven as the Miss requires: from the top of his head to his toes, body hair should be present only if the Miss allows it.
  25. sub will allow himself to be pierced or tattooed as required by his Miss, if safely and professionally done.
  26. sub will submit to enemas, or self-administer enemas, on demand by the Miss.
  27. When urinating, sub will always sit on the toilet; no exceptions.
  28. When a meal is over sub must be quick to clear the table and wash the dishes.
  29. sub will perform all household chores for the Miss, to include:
    • sweep and vacuum all floors and carpets
    • mop and was all floors
    • dust and polish all furniture
    • make the beds every day
    • wash and fold all clothing and linens
    • iron
    • scrub bathrooms
    • clean kitchen
    • cook simple meals; assist in all cooking
    • wash dishes and put them away
    • shop for groceries and put them away
    • take out trash and sort recycled items
    • run all errands as directed
  30. sub worships my Miss’s body and Her whole
  31. sub trust his Miss: Her responsibilities, Her skills, Her hunger and needs, and Her concern for my safety, my emotional, psychological, social, sexual, and physical health.
  32. When the pussy of Miss’ is put onto my mouth and sub is directed to suck it – sub will do so vigorously as long as sub is required to do so.
  33. sub will worship Miss’ ass and lick it clean whenever She wants me to. sub shall do so hungrily, being sure to lick between the cheeks for as long as Miss requires. sub may use my hands to spread my Miss’s cheeks apart.
  34. sub must remove all of my clothing in the way sub have been taught when Miss commands me to do so – regardless of who may be present and despite where it is sub am.
  35. my greatest felt satisfaction is realized when sub know sub have pleased my Miss
  36. The opportunity to please my Miss is very important to me and sub will take every chance to seek out such opportunities to do so to the best of my abilities and in accordance to how sub has been taught or allowed to do so.
  37. my Miss is my greatest treasure.
  38. The safeword given to me by my Miss can be spoken at any time-even when sub have been told to be silent. If sub is not able to verbalize it – sub trusts my Miss will show me how sub can express it. Safewords are for my protection as well as Hers. sub must be careful not to take more than sub can handle, as She will need to know when to stop from getting carried away with Her own passions – so that sub may be prepared over time to endure more for Her.
  39. sub shall never think of himself as a weak person for it takes a strong slave to commit to the drive inside me, to serve, to obey and to please Miss. sub too has responsibilities and as natural as they may seem to me it is important that sub use all of my faculties including my creative spirit to submit to my Miss in a unique fashion personal to my relationship with Her. By doing so sub hopes to provide a good example to those males around me who may still be learning so they too are not led astray from their primary focus, that they are as true to their nature as sub strives to continue to be to mine. sub must remember that how well sub behave enlightens and empowers me to become even closer to who sub is – a devoted slave, of good rapport to a Miss who truly understands my needs in relationship to Her own.
  40. sub may, at times, offer various parts of my body to my Miss in hopes She will take pleasure in using them in whatever ways She wishes. my only hope will be that my offering will please Her. If not, sub wants Her to punish me.
  41. Miss’ cock must be available for Her to use at all times.
  42. If required: a plug of Miss’ choice  must be inserted deeply into my ass before arriving at my Miss’s house. Failure to do so and sub shall feel the punishment She will give upon my ass as sub keep the cheeks of it pulled apart – for the plug was not intended to provide me pleasure.
  43. sub hope Miss will choose to use my tongue as Her towel after Her shower so sub may be able to worship Her body.
  44. Until Miss has chosen it is time for me to wear a more permanent mark of ownership upon my flesh, sub shall proudly wear Her temporary mark of ownership upon me wherever She chooses to place it.
  45. sub shall gladly make my body available to my Miss to be used as furniture: my body positioned to decorate a room or a garden, a footstool to rest Her weary feet and legs upon, my backside as Her table to eat off of, my palms to be used to hold a plate of Her food, or my hands to hold a book open for Her to read or a lamp for Her to see.
  46. When sub have been given permission to play with myself sub shall do so in the following manner: working my cock almost to an orgasm and then stopping for a few minutes, then working it again to almost at orgasm and then stopping for a few minutes, and then finally working it again to a full orgasm. Then and only then shall sub enjoy an orgasm on my own. Should sub cum before the third tier – sub will tell my Miss so sub may be punished. sub will play with myself in that manner even in Her presence.



New idea and further planning.

So I’ve never really been a “handy man” type guy but I got the idea of making my own spreader bar, Miss is ok with the plan so before heading out to the cinema we took a trip down to a hardware store. Bought some wood which a very nice man happily cut up for us (it was 2.5m long so 3 80cm sections) got some eyelets that will fit our rope and some sand paper (no one wants splinters during their kink (well some might and thats fine but not us)).

Its all sat in the back of the car for the moment but I will be making the effort to get it sorted and perfected hopefully. Then once its all done I’m either thinking of staining the wood or painting it not sure yet. My plan in terms of the blog and this little project are to take pictures throughout and show progress and work, and likely after many mistakes what I learnt with a few tips to others that want to make their own. In all I think we had a rather nice day with everything, Miss has been amorous today so we’ve both been satisfied a few times and overall She’s also happy for me to be writing my thoughts and stuff down.

Again if you have any questions etc. please don’t hesitate to contact or comment.


Play Ideas

Last but not least, if you want any other lists adding or have any suggestions for the existing lists please drop me a message.

  • Make him strip naked while You keep Your clothes on.
  • You will perform oral sex upon demand.
  • You may not orgasm without permission.
  • You will do what you are told in the bedroom.
  • Go to nude beach
  • Put a butt plug in his ass. Or get out the strap-on.
  • Have him kneel before You and kiss Your feet.
  • Have him address You as a name of your choosing.
  • Have him kiss Your ass…make him beg to kiss Your ass.
  • You will strip naked whenever told to do so.
  • Tie his hands and have him undress You with his mouth/teeth.
  • Don’t let him masturbate or touch his cock without Your permission at any time.
  • Tie his hands behind his back. Have him kneel with knees spread naked in front of You while You read or watch TV, occasionally nudging his balls or penis with Your shoes.
  • She conducts frequent, frustrating tease and denial sessions that are agony for him and fun for Her. An ice-pack is then applied to his dick so She can immediately get him back in his male chastity device.
  • Either order him to stay erect, or don’t give him permission to have a hard on… either way, punish him if he fails!
  • Use some strong string (kite string), tie a slip noose in the end and tighten it around the head of the penis, tug on it, pull it shake it, lead him with it, whatever You please.
  • Making me do things and monitoring while I do them, and applying punishment for her amusement or to correct me
  • Me being in chastity at work and you sending me sexy messages/pictures
  • Having you play with my ass while in chastity
  • Tied down and being left/teased/used as she wishes
  • Told to do housework naked/with plug/chaste
  • Licking her and being spanked for doing it incorrectly
  • Making me fuck her with a strapon or with a cock gag
  • You decide on the length of the lock up.
  • You get to decide how he cums and how you have sex.
  • Your owner is entitled to tease you about your lack of ability to attain an erection or gain any satisfaction. She has taken it away from you and wants to enjoy it. She can get satisfaction whenever she wants: you can’t. Tough. She probably finds that amusing.
  • Show Your slave Your panty crotch, make him smell it, but no touching without permission.
  • Tie Your slave spread eagle to the bed and tease him for hours. Make sure he has a big hard on, but once he does only touch it when he needs just a little more encouragement, don’t let him cum.
  • Put on his favourite lingerie and tease him with Your beauty.
  • Make him wear a chastity belt or cock cage.
  • Make him screw himself with a dildo.
  • Scratch him with Your finger nails.Tickle him. Pinch his nipples.
  • Sit on his chest and find out what he would do to be allowed to kiss Your nipple. Let him almost kiss it but pull away, make him beg.
  • Take a break, put some worn panties over his face and leave the room for a while and let him think about what else You might do.
  • Squat above his face, make him reach with his tongue to taste the crotch of Your panties…get more promises
  • Blindfold him and make him lick You to several orgasms. Take a break, cum back and do it all again.
  • Rub his face against Your pussy or sit on his face but gag him with Your panties or a gag so that he can’t lick You.
  • Tie his balls off to something behind him so he has to tug on them to smell Your panties or kiss Your ass…stay just out of reach.
  • Masturbate in front of him. Use a dildo or a vibrator.
  • Put the base of the dildo in his mouth and make him satisfy You with it. Do it so his nose presses between Your ass cheeks. He’ll be Your little brown noser and love it.
  • Make him lick the dildo clean.
  • Tie him down to the bed and tie his hands to his penis but do not give him permission to cum with harsh punishments for disobedience.
  • Put Your worn panties over his head so he can smell your odor.
  • Make him wear a cock ring (a watch strap or cat collar works well)
  • Have him pamper You, have him:give You a foot/back/full body massage




    give You a pedicure/manicure,

    paint Your finger/toe nails.

    bathe You/shave your legs.

    cook and serve You a nice dinner.


Punishment Ideas

2nd of the lists, again forgive grammar please.

  • Miss ties a rope round subs balls and i must kneel near by or follow her. Tugs as she pleases
  • Spank or whip him. (wooden spoon, hair brush, belt, ruler, ping pong paddle, riding crop, switch, cat-o-nine tails…)
  • Tie sub in an uncomfortable position.
  • Tie sub ankles together and attach his balls to them.
  • Hog tied. (wrists and ankles tied together)
  • Hanging from the ceiling by subs wrists.
  • In a chair with subs knees pulled up to his shoulders – good for spanking and everything is exposed and vulnerable.
  • Tie up subs balls and cock with a long leather thong, clothes line, or boot lace. Use a long piece and wrap the base and balls repeatedly. Do each ball separately. Tie tight loops around his shaft from base to tip then tie the end back between his legs and up to a belt or to his handcuffs.
  • Attach clothes pins or nipple clips to subs nipples, balls, cock or wherever.
  • Enema.
  • Double up on subs domestic chores, make them more difficult: tie his hands; make him use a toothbrush to clean the toilet, tie his ankles with a short chain and make him wear extra high heels.
  • Deny sub orgasms for a long period of time.
  • Put Ben-gay or icy-hot on subs penis and nipples.
  • Drip candle wax on sub, chest, balls, cock, ass.
  • If you have a remote vibrator or plug, coat that with Icy Hot and stick that in subs ass, use the wireless remote to turn it on and off. Put him in a tight thong under his clothes and go with him to dinner and then to cinema.
  • Have sub wear a chastity device and go to his local gym for training and have him take a shower afterwards. Make sure other people are in shower.
  • Sub must sit down to pee at all toilets. No more splashing! You will post a sign above the toilets in our house that reads: “Males are expected to sit down to keep from splashing on the seat.”
  • Sub will be smooth and hair free below the neck.
  • Sub will submit to spankings and other punishments whenever Miss says you have earned them.
  • Do not wear underwear and socks
  • Freeze a lot of your cum before chastity. Eat daily during sentence
  • Wear butt plug for an entire day
  • Increase butt plug size your ass can handle by 2 sizes
  • Go to a gym with communal showers and take a shower with chastity cage on when other men are present
  • Take 20 naked pictures wearing the chastity cage in different exposing positions and send it to Miss
  • Take a picture kneeling and naked wearing the chastity cage in a locker room/changing room in a gym
  • Sub is not entitled to have your neutered status kept secret. If she wants to show off your condition, she can. Her friends will probably find it amusing too.
  • Miss reserve the right to tell your close friends about your arrangement and his device.

Humiliation Ideas

This is the first of three blog posts which I plan to expand over time, you’ll see the theme. Its something I’ve long tried to get a collated list of things to suggest etc. mixing it up with various bits I’m ever very turned on by or excited or scared. Kind of a kinky bucketlist if you will.

  • Dress in full women’s clothing for all activities
  • Have all male underwear taken and locked in a box. Sub must wear female underwear of Miss’ choice, Miss’ could even make him wear your underwear from the day before.
  • Humiliate sub in public…take him shopping for panties/lingerie and make him ask size questions
  • Make sub eat his own cum
  • Make sub do exercises (jumping jacks, leg spreads, squats, aerobics, yoga…) naked, plugged
  • Make your sub orgasm and shoot his cum onto your strap on.  Spread it around, use it as lube, and fuck his ass hard
  • Make your sub orgasm and shoot his cum onto Miss’ strap on.  Spread it around, and then make sub deep throat it, and suck and lick it all up until the strap on is clean
  • Make your sub cum into an ice cube tray several times, until he has enough to make a cum cube.  When he is disobedient, make him suck on the cum cube until it is gone
  • Make a home date day, and dress your sub up in makeup, stockings, and heels, and make him your maid for the day
  • Get a suction cup dildo and mount on hard floor, bend sub over and fuck him in the ass while you push his head up and down on the cock.  Make him your cock whore
  • Face fuck sub with your strap on, by holding on to his ears, and plowing into him with force so that you are causing him to gag
  • Invite a girlfriend over for a night of torment to show your friend how you train your sub
  • Make sub wear Your panties or lingerie, dress him up as a little girl or a French maid.
  • Make subdo housework naked or dressed in women’s clothes, maybe with sub being plugged or with nipple clamps. A bell around your cock and balls.
  • Make sub hand wash Your panties and lingerie.
  • Make sub polish Your shoes with his tongue.
  • Make sub wear a collar and lead him around with a leash, like a dog.
  • Make sub walk around gym locker room nude
  • Attach a leash to subs balls or cock ring, and lead him around with that. Tie it off in front of the sink while he does the dishes.
  • Make your sub cum onto your asshole, and then lick it all up
  • Ride sub around as Your pony boy…spurs? a riding crop?
  • Dress sub up like the slut that he is, wear a strap-on dildo and make him beg to suck it. fuck him. (don’t forget the fuck-me red lipstick!)
  • Make sub wear Your panties or lingerie under his regular clothes when he goes out or goes to work so that he will think of his Mistress constantly.
  • Body writing is always a fun way to humiliate sub, pick 10 degrading words/phrases and them wherever you wish on his body in pen or lipstick.
  • Make sub masturbate for You, make him beg for permission to cum, don’t let him, punish him if he does.
  • Make him earn his rewards; for example:Allow him to kiss Your ass after the dishes are done.

    1 minute of pleasure for him for 10 minutes of Yours. 5 minutes of pleasure for him after he makes You cum 5 times. Spank him 10 times for each minute it takes him to make You cum.


    If You think he’s earned an orgasm, make him cum on Your feet or Your ass and then make him lick You clean.

  • Order sub to bring himself to the edge of orgasm and stay there until You give him permission. When You give the command he must cum within 5 seconds or he will be punished and/or not allowed to cum at all. (keep him that way for 30 minutes, an hour…or as long as You want)
  • If subs really horny and bothering You, You may want to curb his interest by ordering him to jerk off 5 or 6 times in a row. Use it as skin conditioner… 3 times on each foot, have him spread it around and lick them clean after each time.
  • Always make sub lick You clean after sex.
  • When You go out, order him to tie himself up, be naked or dressed up as a girl and be kneeling at the door for when You arrive.
  • Lock a padlock on his balls.
  • Give sub a golden shower.
  • Make sub think of a new way for You to humiliate him. Punish him if You don’t think it’s good enough. Make him post it to the net (and send it to me to add to the list)
  • Have sub lick You clean after you pee. 



So little old me had a plan

Whilst pondering & browsing the usual fetlife, Tumblr etc. etc. I had a thought. I’ve not posted to my blog in a very long time, infact I’ve actually removed and moved it since I last updated it. So to motivate myself to blog more, get my thoughts out more and generally be open with the world of the anonymous I figured I’d start paying for my blog.

Now the thing with this plan is it doesn’t give me any bonus thoughts or ideas to put on here, so anyone who wants to ask anything about things we’ve done etc. I’m happy to answer, any subject you’d like me to write about just give me a shout and I’ll give it a try if I think its within my sphere.

I’ve left my “About” section intentionally brief, hoping it gets people interested enough to read through my other posts. So for more information about me then I suppose. I’m a fairly young guy, with a mild addiction to nice food, a heavy addiction to coffee who happens to play a lot of video games. Kink me is a guy who loves to wear pretty things (panties, stockings and other womens underwear), yet  to explore wearing other bits but do have a curiosity to try. I’ve long wanted to be kept in chastity but due to anatomical issues its very difficult to find a cage suitable at a reasonable price for a try before investing a lot of money. I love anything playing with my ass (tongues, fingers, toys). I have more toys than we’ve actually been able to use to date (we’ve been together a while too!) theres a lot I’m curious about but not had the chance to try.

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