So the last couple of days I’ve been wearing a bra whilst at home, we did some shopping pre holiday and Miss picked me up a non wired t-shirt bra which I wore a few times during the trip, its a 40C and fits fairly well. We did measurements using abrathatfits.org/calculator.php which admittedly put me at a 40DD which we reckon would be MASSIVE for my ample sissy bossom. Since we’ve been back we picked up a couple of underwired options in a 40B (my suggestion I admit) that I’ve been wearing since when not in bed. It has definitely made me more aware, we’ve only just got back from our post work dog walk and I couldn’t help wondering if anyone noticed during the walk I mean, when I look down I can definitely tell I look a little bit booby.
I do really want to get back to having the time to maintain my smooth from the neck down & cleaning of my insides, real life has been a bit of a bitch for that. I’ve also found myself daydreaming of Miss putting me into humiliating situations/conditions a lot. I think my brains rebelling against the real life and not feeling my sissy self.
Last night as many nights really, I found myself unable to sleep so rather than just fester or play games like I’d normally do. Instead I took the time provided by my abnormal sleep to epilate my legs and bikini line, it does make me feel more me (the sissy bitch me) so after my drive to work this morning one of my couple of days in the office a week I keep finding myself enjoying the feel of my smooth legs through my silly both clothes.
Annoyingly it does seem that the sleep abnormality is tied to work because the entirety of last week whilst we were on holiday I was able to sleep normally.
I know bit of a strange update for me but as I use this more as a journal figured I’d put this out into the aether.
Starting the week as I mean to go on, attempting optimism which is in itself strange. Today I went with a very cute thong for my underwear choice.
I’ve been caged a little over a week now and starting to feel it, my need to be penetrated, used or humiliated has been on the rise throughout too. Its clearly tied to the cage and the feeling of being owned that gives constantly.
We’ve both been a bit tired but I’m trying to keep ontop of that and stay in the mindset but still have slips of snappiness related to the tiredness.
Chatting with another sub online the other night, he was going through a tough time because of something he’d been aroused by and thought that he wanted to act it out because the level of arousal. After chatting for a while and describing experiences that were similar in that I sometimes have fantasies regarding cuckolding, being outed to family etc. which can all be extremely vivid, extremely personal and exceptionally provocative during those times when I do. However and it is a very big however I know that those aren’t things I ever want to truly experience I get that for others they’re kinks they live and breath but to me they’re on my list of “Most definitely, 100% no”, cuckolding for example I think would damage my relationship with Miss (who for new readers is also my wife) and that isn’t something I would ever risk regardless, it’s also something I don’t think I myself am mentally strong enough for not for it to actually happen I’ve been in relationships in the past where I’ve been cheated on (several times off the top of my head 3). Each time its hurt in unimaginable levels and whilst I imagine for some there’s a sense of catharsis in having some limited control of the situation, or even putting themselves through similar situation etc. but for me its a big blazing red light.
His fantasies were scaring him as they were on the extreme side of the kink world and I like to think I helped guide him a little bit.
It really got me thinking how over the years (I’ve dabbled, and fantasized about Femdom, chastity etc. for christ nearly getting on 2 decades… SCARY FACE MOMENT!) I’ve grown to kind of (not completely but getting there with help from Miss) work out what it is about kink that I like, what it is I want and need and looking back how whilst not the thirsty subs you get online lol how I’ve grown in my knowledge and understanding of myself and kink. I also recently picked up a copy of the “Yes, No, Maybe Workbook” which I’m looking forward to going through and see if I can expand on my understanding even more (I read voraciously and when I get into a subject I NEED to know things).
I’ve been having a lot of desires for humiliation and the lack of control aspects of play these last couple of days whilst caged, but yesterday was absolutely exhausted to the point I got home, went on the computer a short time before eating then hastily collapsing to sleep on the couch. Part of why my goal today (mini goals and such) is to sleep before 2am, something which hasn’t happened in several weeks!
So signing off on route to succeeding in that goal. As always anything anyone wants to ask regardless of subject or anything please feel free, I always respond to my comments and really appreciate input.
After so long not doing anything for my sissy side, this weekend has been like a second (or third, or fourth etc.) coming. Yesterday was spent getting nice and smooth with a nearly all over epilation (still need to ask Miss to deal with my sissy ass) and the majority of today was a very thorough enema.
After all that I’ve been feeling so much lighter and happier, even though I’ve only just finished. I feel ready to be my sissy self again and be the slutty sissy Miss deserves to please her. Short but sweet post for now.
Having been walking pooch each evening in sissy clothes, it really got me thinking how much I enjoy dressing up. Especially being a little show off slut like I was the other night. I’ve always been a bit more uninhibited than the average person but dressing up and being outside makes me that little bit excited, that little bit scared and all the turned on.
I’ve been caged pretty much all of this month which probably adds to that last part but it does make me want more clothes, a better option for hair management (currently looking at home laser hair treatment options). Then once covid has come and gone (or is more under control) I could in theory just get the areas the home laser treatment can’t do waxed.
In other news Christmas has come and gone and I love everything Miss got me, she gave me a few bits before we travelled to family (few kinky items) and we brought everything else over with us and I’m over the moon with everything and glad everyone enjoyed my first Christmas Dinner (although for a much smaller group than normal due to following all the guidelines :))
So following the UK changes to Christmas & the tier system our family plans took a major hit, which lead to me needing to take a trip to collect presents so they can be shipped to my sister. Normal drive there (although plugged, wearing fishnet tights, and a pink basque) but on the way back Miss had decided that I was to change out of my silly boy jeans and into a more appropriate skirt. To be followed by sending picture evidence, now the road between our city and Manchester is hilly and remote but fairly well travelled so I had to find a spot to stop over.
After finding a spot, I turned off the engine took out the key and ran to the passenger side of the car. Taking my shoes off outside lead to cold feet but I was too excited to care. I hurriedly took off the jeans and started taking a few snaps for Miss to enjoy, at which point cars started passing me stood in the dark next to the car (inside lights on) full beams of these other vehicles in my direction, I have no way to know what they saw but it made my blood pump so fast thinking someone may have seen this sissy little bitch by the road side, or thought they just got a view of a woman changing.
After letting my heart slow a little I got back into the car and moved on thinking of home and Miss, it wasn’t till I got to the next layby that I thought it was a nicer spot for some outside the car snaps getting excited again I was out of the car without any hesitation this time a few cars rushed by and I knew I looked hot as fuck and didn’t care what they saw, again out comes the phone and snap snap snap flashes in this black wilderness occasionally sprayed with car lights.
When I got home eventually after driving through McDonalds drive through all dressed up and masked to pick up our food I find Miss on the couch with our puppy all snuggled not feeling herself. So we ate looked after our pooch and I took her for her nighttime walk, several times having to bend right over (no one around) to stroke a very nervous slightly poorly pooch.
And that leaves me here, dressed up and horny but wishing a pooch and Miss to feel better.
Miss came down in pain on Saturday morning (Friday night as she went to bed). So the weekend was spent looking after her mostly, making her call the non emergency NHS number on Sunday night which resulted in a rather unexpected visit from a pair of lovely ambulance men, net result of which was “Call the GP in the morning”, although they did offer to take her into hospital.
Monday when we she got the call back resulted in a couple of prescriptions for a large amount of pain meds. Thankfully she’s starting to feel better and got a much better nights sleep last night (as did I, I’d previously had 2 sleep less nights with a few naps during the days to top up).
Hoping we can get some play in once she’s feeling better and definitely looking forward to restarting our daily walks. Neither of us has come down with CV19 as yet which is good news, and we’re still taking all the precautions advised. Can’t wait to get back to some normalcy.
So been a little quiet the last few days, but there has been some kink in the mix of crazy amounts of work and stressful days. Works been a bit of a bitch, just got a few new things we’re set to do which is all fine etc. but first day we’re due to start 3 client facing systems decide to go kablooey. Leaving me and my one colleague in my team rushing around to sort them and forgetting our new task. Gotta say less than ideal, we got it done about 1 hour or so later than planned annoyingly and with a bit of snark from our manager. What can we say multiple systems break we fix them in an hour and then get snark for the new thing slipping our minds with the critical incidents setting fires…
In terms of kink though, I had another spurt (pardon the pun) of ejections. Miss was making cake for a charity day at work (same charity as my custard & cinnamon buns), and in between bakes she had me come kiss her beautiful ass. As she was due back in the kitchen she told me I had to follow and didn’t instruct me to stop kissing, I must say you see people doing this in videos etc. and its quiet the workout to keep up with the walking folk and continue to kiss an ass. Immediately Miss laughed a bit and every bit of my body reacted with me very soon finding myself in very damp panties. Once she was done in the kitchen I continued following as she’d not said to stop and was lead to the bedroom where I was placed at the end of the bed, face inches from her after handing her the wand. Again whilst she was playing I left several wet patches not just in my panties but soaking through to the bed itself.
Now the funny thing is we have a very powerful wand… during playing Miss pulled my head that close to watch her playing that I actually found my head was touching the vibrator, on several occasions the bridge of my nose too. It took so much willpower not to laugh (its rather amusing having a powerful vibrator touching your head!) and actually couldn’t help myself but laugh once, and begin sneezing a few times (bridge of nose + vibrator = better than pepper to make you sneeze!). After a few orgasms Miss stopped and I had to tell her the above, we both laughed and cuddled for a bit before going back to snuggle on the couch.
Other work stuff in between has just been chaotic at best, especially as Miss has had a very bad tum since around Friday/Saturday (can’t recall exactly) so we’ve been dosing her with pills & milk of magnesia, hopefully she’s getting better as I hate seeing her in pain like she’s been.
Anyways, thought I’d give a brief update on what we’ve been upto. Please don’t hesitate to comment or drop me a message.
The baking went down well today, I may not have won star baker but then the judges 1.) didn’t like cinnamon & 2.) didn’t get any of my egg custard because it was gone before they could.
Today again Miss hasn’t been feeling great, so an evening looking after her. When I got home I made a shopping list of items we need and meals we could have over the next week and rushed to the shop. Spent next to no time getting things and rushed home to feed Miss, I’m only still up because I’m making sure she has leggings for work tomorrow. It’ll be a long day because I’m dropped her off at 7.30am and then working for a bit from home before going to the dentists.
The unexpected turn to my evening, whilst sat at my desk just toddling around online I kind of accidentally rubbed my nipple… and instantly started to feel that familiar pulse between my legs, and there I was not shooting more dribbling a full load. Now since getting back from the shops I’ve been plugged, in my nice little nighty and a very very sexy g-string. But this is the first time I’ve experienced quiet a reaction from nothing, now I’ve cum from just pleasuring Miss, I’ve cum very fast in other scenarios but wow a rub of my nipple and boom. I had started to get the slight familiar ache in my balls but this seems to have alleviated that too. So that’s a good thing, or else I’d have had to request unlock from Miss (I’m not kidding since surgery on my testicles pain there = me not walking/moving).